Harmony Junkies!

“Blind compassion is rooted in the belief that we are all doing the best we can. When we are driven by blind compassion, we cut everyone far too much slack, making excuses for others’ behavior and making nice situations that require a forceful “no”, an unmistakable voicing of displeasure, or a firm setting and maintaining of boundaries. These things can, and often should be done out of love, but blind compassion keeps love too meek, sentenced to wearing a kind face. Blind compassion is kindness rooted in fear, and not just fear of confrontation, but also fear of not coming across as a good or spiritual person.
When we are engaged in blind compassion we rarely show anger, for we not only believe that compassion has to be gentle, we are also frightened of upsetting anyone, especially to the point of their confronting us. This is reinforced by our judgment about anger, especially in its more fiery forms, as something less spiritual; something that shouldn’t be there if we were being truly loving. Blind compassion reduces us to harmony junkies, entrapping us in unrelentingly positive expression.
With blind compassion we don’t know how to – or won’t learn how to – say “no” with any real power, avoiding confrontation at all costs and, as a result, enabling unhealthy patterns to continue. Our “yes” is then anemic and impotent, devoid of impact it could have if we were also able to access a clear, strong “no” that emanated from our core.
When we mute our essential voice, our openness is reduced to a permissive gap, an undiscerning embrace, a poorly boundaries receptivity, all of which indicate a lack of compassion for ourselves (in that we don’t adequately protect ourselves). Blind compassion confuses anger with aggression, forcefulness with violence, judgment with condemnation, caring with exaggerated tolerance, and more tolerance with spiritual correctness.”
From – Robert Augustus Masters, Spiritual Bypassing

Where there is understanding, there is love…….

Where there is understanding, there is love. When we understand the suffering of someone, we are motivated to help, and the energies of love and compassion are released. Whatever we do in this spirit will be for the happiness and liberation of the person we love. But, sometimes we destroy the person we love. We have to practice in a way that whatever we do for others will only make them happy. The willingness to love is not enough. When people do not understand each other, it is impossible for them to love each other.

– Thich Nhat Hanh

Love by Adyashanti

“The love of which I am speaking arises directly out of a profound depth of realization. It has nothing to do with doing the right thing or being a good person. Such notions come from an egoic mind masquerading in spiritual clothing.. I am speaking about a force of love that originates from beyond the mind – from consciousness itself.”

~ Adyashanti

Thich Nhat Hanh on Interbeing……..

In the Buddhist tradition, there is the wonderful teaching of interbeing. A typical example is this sheet of paper. The sheet of paper manifests itself as having recto, verso, a left and a right. The left cannot be by itself. The left has to lean on the right in order to express herself. And the right cannot exist by herself. The right has to lean on the left in order to express herself. That is true with everything, including birth and death. Birth cannot be by itself. Birth has to lean on death in order to manifest itself. Death can not be by itself. It has to rely on birth in order to manifest itself.
When we look into our body, we see that birth and death manifest together every moment. If there is no death, there will be no birth. Many cells are dying this very moment. Death is happening now, not in the future. Because of the death of many cells, other new cells are possible. It’s clear that the birth of new cells relies on the death of old cells. Birth and death like to be with each other. There can never be birth without death, and there can never be death without birth.
The death of a cloud means the birth of the rain. Birth and death inter-are. This is a very deep teaching. On the surface, it seems that there is birth and death, but looking deeply, we see that there is no birth and no death.
– Thich Nhat Hanh, in “Our Cosmic Body”.

A Letter to a Dear, Dark Friend……by Jeff Brown

A Letter to a Dear, Dark Friend

Yes, I know the government is corrupt. Yes, I know
there are people conspiring. Yes, I know people can
lack integrity. Yes, I know that western culture is materialistic.
Yes, I know that corporations are self-serving.
Yes, I know that the media is manipulative. Yes, I know
it is hard to trust love. Yes, I know that it can be difficult
to believe in God. I share many of your concerns.

And I also know that we cannot change the world
without acknowledging what is wrong. I know that we
must stand against that which shames, oppresses and
damages humanity. I know that we should not ignore
the injustices and put on a fake smile. I know that we
must find our voice and stand our ground. I know that
we must fight for our right to the light. I believe deeply
in forward moving criticism.

But something doesn’t feel quite right. You complain
all the time. You have made negativity a full time
job. You don’t make an effort to find solutions. You
blame everything on the world out there. You don’t actually
do anything positive to effect change. And you
seldom acknowledge the positive steps humanity has
made. You seldom acknowledge the beauty around
you. You almost never see the light in the darkness.

I know something from my lived experience. I
know that the light is always there. It is there, in the
breath that keeps you alive, in the smile of a child, in
the yet another chance to find your path. It is there in
the rise of the feminine, in the therapeutic revolution,
in the burgeoning quest for authenticity. If you can’t see
it, then the issue is a personal one, for there are signs of
progress everywhere.

And I also know from a lifetime of overcoming that
it is possible to hold it all at once. To fight against injustice
while still embodying the light. To see where we
are lacking, while rejoicing in our abundance. To express
our anger, and to live our gratitude. To feel overwhelmed
by an unfair world, while still achieving our
goals. To see how far we have yet to travel, while applauding
how far we have come.

And so I wonder what lives below your perpetual
negativity? Apart from the problems with the world,
what happened that darkened your lens? What made
the glass so empty? Is it really all about the world ‘out
there’, or are there also unresolved personal experiences
that need to be healed? What are you really trying to express
about the lack of love, attention, and satisfaction
in your life? What lives below this victimhood? What is
your deeper complaint? What needs to be expressed and
resolved so that you will see some light shining through
again? Please don’t wait until the world is perfect, for it
will never be so.

Dear friend, how can I help you to believe again?

(~an excerpt from the book ‘Love it Forward’)by Jeff Brown

The Work Description by Byron Katie

Hi Katie,

i have something that bothers me for a long long time now. a few years ago i experienced a few moments of truth, i felt love, faith, i felt god is inside of me and in these moments i saw the mind is not me. i observed as it was talking and talking. but since then i can get used to my “normal state” of not feeling all these things, since then i feel as if I’m living a lie and i can’t stop it no matter what i do. it was a gift that was given to me and then disappeared and left me with a huge anger towards my mind and towards my self. please give me an advice what to do in order to see the truth through the work
with love

Dearest Tal,

In those few moments you speak of, in that state of grace, you were, in my experience, given a very important gift, you were given a reference for what it is to be free from the mind’s attachment to a false self, the mind that would imagine that it was something other than just that, mind. At some point in your experience, a thought happened, you attached to that thought, in other words, you believed it as it came through, and this “unlimited you” experience ended, and you have remained a bit bitter and homesick or ……? Lost? What was the thought or assumption that brought you back into the dream world? Find it, identify and question it. It was important enough to die for at the time. You attached, believed, assumed to be true whatever you were thinking, and you lost the only life you have ever really loved.

Let’s look at it this way: The Work is a way to go back to where you came from, that unlimited love, thought by thought, assumption by assumption. To identify stressful thoughts that create this illusion of an unfriendly, fearful universe as they arise, write them down and then question them. If you were mind, could you exist if you didn’t identify as a “something”? You are that perceived “something” that it has identified as, and so the rest of the world seems to be real to the mind that would project out of that false self, perceive what isn’t anything other than pure imagination. (There is more to it and that comes later. For now, first “things” first.)

This isn’t serious, life is simply the dream to wake up from. Soo, you ask for help. Sooo, imagine all the knowledge and wisdom without limit in the world living as one side of your mind, and its true nature is pure love. It can only know kindness, mercy, compassion, and pure truth. Okay? Now, imagine all the beliefs that would oppose, argue with, do war against this wisdom, this pure light. The other part of the mind, the terrified mind, would scream at all that the wise side understands. In its terror and ignorance, in its “I know” confused state, it would override and do anything, believe anything, to be right. It must win in order to “be,” and it can never win against the power of what really is pure love and its true reflection. It would die into its own heart, the wise side would take it over, enlighten it, if it dared to pause for one honest moment as it listens to the wise side’s answer to “Is it true” from the center of itself.

Now imagine the four questions and turnaround in the center, between the two sides of the mind. As the bridge between the two, actually as the center. This center holds no opinion at all, not even the opinion that the “I-know” mind should slow down, get still, pay attention to, or listen to the wise side (the other side of its own self). The center holding the questions doesn’t believe that its questions should be heard, answered, or even observed, it is a non-believer and leaves it to the willingness of the “I-know” mind to use its questions. It lives as a friend, a bridge to the other side of itself without any shoulds, shouldn’ts, wants, or needs. No “becauses,” no “buts.” It is always there and always available, it just is there to be used or not. If the “I-know” mind is willing to use the four questions to reach the other side, and stops long enough to allow the wise side to answer, to live, in that pause, the wise side’s pure love and wisdom will penetrate and change it forever. Eventually the confused “I-know” mind becomes the wise mind, and nothing is left to know in that known. It is the end of war with the self, the end of war of the mind with itself and all of life.

To do The Work is to give the ignorant, frightened, uneducated, imagined self an opportunity to wake itself up to what is its own beloved. To let the answers to the questions penetrate, educate the confused mind is to enlighten it, to set itself free from the fear and delusions of what isn’t real, no matter how real it seems, it is awake to and get free from the false fearful imagined self, at last, free from its own mistaken identity, the “what isn’t.” The Work works only when the confused mind truly and honestly invites and surrenders to listen to its very own dearest self. In that surrender, it witnesses and truly meets the greatest power, the only power, the one that knows all, the one longed for, the Self, God.

So, my angel, Tal, I offer you my experience and metaphor of the help you ask and direct you to it in every way I can direct you, to how to get back to the greatest power of all and where it resides. Big respect for that reference, no shortcuts. I invite you to be still, wait, and re-know what has always been until it is no longer necessary. Go home, in time, in the name of love, your true name, for goodness’ sake.

Thank you for writing, I love that you dreamed you, me, as well as all else apparently alive, and I invite you to test for yourself all that I invite you to. It’s safe, I am that other side speaking, and I give you, as the center, the way to the love you can trust and rest in, the love of your own dearest self. Meet me there, I wait in time, and in that, I am immovable. Again, I invite you to the creator of all, and that would be you. Thank you for dreaming me up.

Loving what isn’t all, as though it were,

Another Great Post by Caroline de Lisser

She’s learning the fine art of disagreeing without being reactive or needing to prove that she is right…
She’s learning that she can be strongly opposed to something without having to go into battle with it…
She’s learning that when she brings love to something it melts all the sharp edges and becomes pliable and agreeable to transformation…
She accepts what is before her because she now knows that whatever it is, it is “for” her not against her as she had once thought…
What comes always holds a reflection and an opportunity for her to choose love above fear and discover more of herself.
© Caroline de Lisser

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